Today something important happened. I went out in public and nothing happened! I have been eager to arrange my first time out for ages, but I always knew that several conditions would have to be just right to allow me my opportunity. Today all those doors were open and I simply walked through into the big wide world. I went for a drive, took a walk in a park and browsed the shops.

This was no sudden whim: I have planned this for months. The only thing I could not plan in advance was the date. I discussed what to expect with a few close friends here and they gave me firm encouragement, but probably thought I was backing off, even though I promised I would do it soon. Thank you for your help; I am delighted to tell you it was as easy and rewarding as you assured me.

I made a few significant decisions a while ago. One was to wear trousers. All the women around here wear trousers routinely except for special occasions. As this was not going to be a special occasion - as far as anyone could tell - I must follow the style. I did, however, wear my tight-fitting skinny jeans to show off an obviously female shape, in case anyone doubted me and glanced down to check. The other vital decision was never to be on guard against being made. I never looked around to search for people reacting with suspicion. I feel that giving someone a searching stare is more likely to invite an unwelcome inspection.

With great excitement, I got ready much as usual, though I applied a much lighter makeup than normal. Slightly stronger makeup works well in photographs, but I wanted to appear almost without makeup today by using very natural tones. I also picked up a large shapeless jacket to hide inside, as I didn't wish to attract attention. When I was ready I looked in the full-length mirror and saw an ordinary woman just like the hundreds I have seen in the shopping mall.

Then a very strange thing happened: all nervousness melted away. I was hardly even excited at the adventure that lay ahead! So I just picked up my handbag, let myself out the door, walked along the street to my car and drove off. Nobody screamed, fainted or looked twice.

To be continued ...

Tags:   Emma Ross outside

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Continued from the previous photo:

I drove to the next town, hoping it was far enough from home. The last thing I wanted was to meet someone I knew because even if they did not recognise me, I might give away a telling sign myself. There is a park in the town centre where I could expect to meet few people and all of them at a safe distance, so I pulled in and set out down a sloping path and over the river. I used this deserted path to remind myself how to walk. I was not so much trying to immitate a woman's walk, which could easily lead me into cariacature, as eliminate the obviously male aspects of walking. Instead of leading with my shoulders, I led with my hips.

As I strolled along the far side of the river, I passed about four people. I really do not know whether I passed since I did not look back at them. Did they think I was male or female? I believe they simply did not care. The question was an irrelevant distraction to their own private thoughts and was never considered. This is very good news, for it shows there are no dazzlingly obvious errors in my presentation.

Finally my car was just over a second footbridge, but now I discover the park links the local college with the shops and this section was thronged with dozens of kids. I have been warned they are the most critical, or at least the most likely to voice their hilarious discovery, however this was no time to turn away. I wove through them, giving an occasional little "Scuse please" and "Thanks". I was basically invisible to them.

Just before reaching the car, I spotted a quiet corner of the parking area with a railing inside some bushes - perfect for a photo! I clipped my camera onto the railing, hidden from view by a bush, and took the pic I posted yesterday.

My first excursion was going exceedingly well and I felt ready to make contact with more people so I drove round to the shopping mall car park, where I took another photo. As I left the car I realised these were the wrong sort of shops. These shops were places like carpet showrooms, where every new customer is greeted by a salesperson intent on discussing what you would like. That's too much contact for me!

The answer was simply to go to Asda (Walmart). Huge and impersonnal, it would let me mingle in peace. There were certainly more people there, including a woman who gave me a close look and turned to see me as I walked by her, however she was staring down at my boots. She was checking my boots! The security guard on the door also gave me a look, but no more than anybody else.

Of course I went straight to dresses, tops and swimwear. There are some lovely summer clothes in the George range right now! This was not a day for buying, however. I went up and down the aisles browsing through this and that, checking prices, seeking the right size and occasionally holding something against myself. It was thrilling to visualise myself wearing many of the gorgeously feminine items!

Several other women had to walk round me to look at the next rail and I had to pass them too, yet they were all concentrating too hard on their own quest to notice me. I find that whenever I briefly pass through that section as a man, I will get watched suspiciously by the women shopping there. I don't know what they suspect: I suppose it's a privacy issue. Yet there I was, shoulder to shoulder with the other women, picking through the merchandise, and I was one of them. I felt tremendously pleased and proud to be accepted so completely, however nobody had tried talking with me yet, which is just as well.

After twenty minutes I had had enough. I returned to the exit by wandering slowly through the lingerie section in exactly the way I normally don't. It was not lust for frilly undies that took me there; it was a test of people's reactions and the result was nil. Either nobody made me, or nobody was prepared to make a complaint - a typically British trait.

In the end I was home safely, feeling immensely satisfied with an absolutely uneventful first time out. I'm sure the thrill will stay with me for ages, or at least until my next outing. You know it's going to happen again, don't you!

Tags:   Emma Ross outside

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Who said it would not be long until my next outing? You were right! This time I went to a more up-market mall, close to a business district, where a skirt would not be unusual.

I met many more people here, particularly on the ground level, where there were several sales pitches in the middle of the mall. I turned down a some nail adornments, a gym membership and a video subscription - quite easily.

Again, it was lovely to be able to try on shoes and search through dresses undisturbed. I did see one adorable dress, but they didn't have my size on display. Perhaps that's just as well!

I only took a few pics and they are not very clear so I thought if I join them up quickly in a video you will not notice the poor quality.

All I can say is, don't stop me now!

Tags:   Emma Ross outside

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Did I really say women don't photograph themselves in dress stores? Well here I am doing so. Phones can take pics so I just toyed with mine and from time to time aimed it at a mirror. It must be easier when you are with a friend or simply use a tripod, but I was alone and had to look for mirrors or big dark windows.

These snapshots are not great photos, yet I like them because they show me in deepest ladieswear without anyone noticing.

Tags:   Emma Ross shopping

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The big mirror in this lift seemed ideal for a quick snapshot in the brief period of privacy. Lesson one of photos in mirrors - don't use flash!

Tags:   Emma Ross outside mirror lift flash

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