...and, I don't. Ever.

Another favorite from this spring, in the continuing series of "photographing books". I think I spent an hour in the bedroom that morning with a bunch of tulips, my favorite books (this one is a book of short stories by F. Scott Fitzgerald) and the morning light.

Image made with a Hasselblad 500 C/M.

Tags:   book books the last of the belles f. scott fitzgerald tulip flower spring bokeh hasselblad hasselblad 500 c/m film medium format square analog window light bedroom

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Two things that I am completely in love with: wildflowers, and this song. (Oh, and let's not forget Ben Howard himself.)

Image made up at Silver Star with my Hasselblad 500 C/M.

Tags:   tiger lily wildflower silver star rain silver star mountain hike hiking washington pacific northwest fog mist bokeh analog medium format film hasselblad hasselblad 500 C/M square flower macro closeup ben howard soldiers

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Tags:   flower macro color purple petals

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Sometimes there is nothing but the slow tick of time. Nothing to remember with any certainty, nothing to forget. Nothing to look forward to. The only company the beat of your own heart and the rise and fall of your own chest.

Maybe it's not that the world is too much with you, but rather that it's not with you at all. You are outside of it, outside looking in. Those glancing at you would find nothing but a shadow, a form so slippery and ethereal that their eyes would slide to the side, unable to register your presence. Your English teacher, in her quest to explain the world to a handful of those out to change it, once said that happy stories are not as interesting as sad stories, because happy people are all happy in the same way, but sad people are sad in different ways.

Tears come in so many forms. All the same chemistry, but some slow and cold and some hot and fast. Sometimes the world is so quiet around you that they each make a distinctly audible plunk into your lap. First slow and staccato and separate, plunk.... plunk....

plunk...

but soon fast and pooling in their plunkplunkplunkplunkplunk. Sometimes the sensation of them is enough to make you pause, such as the ones that come when you lie on your back and stare ceiling-wards - the ones that curl over the sides of your face and begin to flow like a trickling stream into your ears.

There are the kind that take you by complete surprise, that are borne up to your face on the wave of a keen aching, so quick and violent that your nose stings and pinches and you find your forehead pressed to the cool solid support of the nearest wall while your body shakes. And then there are the kind that you know are coming as soon as you crawl into bed and pull the sheet up and are forced to remember not what is present in your life, but what isn't.

And there are more, so many more. They all have different beginnings and different lives, but each the same end, as endless as they may seem.

---

Macro image of the flower Crocosmia Luficer, taken with my Nikon FM and a reversed lens, on Fuji Velvia 50.

Tags:   flower macro red abstract crocosmia lucifer nikonfm film velvia fuji floralscape

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Today would have been my Grandmother's birthday. She was such an amazing woman, full of life and love and intelligence. In her memory, here are a few images that remind me of her.

This one is of her roses. It's grainy and old, but I still love the texture and colors and the associated memories.

Image made with a Pentax K100.

Tags:   film analog 35mm pentax k1000 grandma iowa roses garden grainy pink flowers floralscape midwest memory

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