Hello

Influenced by Kay, another transvestite here in the UK with an amazing body and enviable smooth feminine looking skin I was emboldened to post this picture though I'm an amateur compared to her.

I think it's fair to say I love dressing up as a woman rather a lot. In fact sometimes I really wish I was a woman. I find myself desperate to be female and no longer be male. I want my male self to be banished and never return. I find myself getting right into being a woman and delude myself I am at last female.

This is emotionally a powerful experience and often when I return to being a man once more the whole experience can leave me drained and fearful. So powerful do I desire to switch to being female I can almost weep with the joy of it when I appear as as a woman. I love how my emotions feel so free when I dress up as a woman and I definitely feel at home pretending I am one.

But, it is all illusion, I am a transvestite, a man dressing up in women's lingerie, female fashions and painting myself in layers of makeup whilst wearing a wig. I am not a woman, I'm a man. This indulgence dies give me a lot of joy and I have a rather fun time with it all yet it does affect me in the emotionally way I described.

I do enjoy my male life and I believe it is the fact I am really a man that adds to the experience of cross-dressing and acting as a female. I do though dream of being able to pass as a female, I would love to be accomplished enough to look and act female in a real way. I never will achieve this dream as I don't look like a woman when I cross-dress and my acting efforts are not great. Don't get me wrong, I have a lovely time attempting my female portrayal but I know realistically I look like a man in a dress. I'm pretty rubbish at being a transvestite. I think it is a goal I enjoy pursuing but will never be very good at looking the part.

This is not an attempt to generate complimentary replies, I assure you I am being completely realistic with myself. I know how much I love cross-dressing, have a dream, I always have a lot of fun and reward but I also have doubts, fears and know I do not look convincing as a woman, I know my limitations.

I think this picture shows how delusional I can be as I recall I wanted to look female and sexy and though I'm not homosexual I did want to look female enough that men desire me as a woman. It is a display of pure vanity, ego and the element of fun and excitement that being a transvestite provides. The bottom line, pathetic as this image is, being I had a wonderful exciting time by posing for this image and imagining in my head I was a woman. For a few hours I had switched gender in my head and that was truly a real reward and a comfortable place to be both mentally sand physically.

Helene x

Tags:   transvestite crossdress t-girl transgender transsexual transexual t-gurl gurl drag transvestism transsexualism female impersonator female illusion male to female female impersonation tranny trannie trans queen glbt m2f m to f crossdressing crossdresser gender gay lesbian effeminate boy to girl acting performance wig makeup dressing up as a woman

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