Helene is free again!

Unbelievably, after my months of frustration at no opportunity to cross-dress, today I suddenly had the house to myself. I rushed to the bathroom and completely shaved off all my body hair…it feels amazing to be smooth and hairless once more… and then it was out with the make-up, slip on a dress, step into heels, don a wig and allow euphoria to engulf me.

I have no real opportunity to set up for photos so I just took some on my phone from as far as my arm could reach. I am ecstatic, I adore being a woman. I had forgotten the sheer delight of spending time as a woman.

As I type this note I'm truly delighted and still dressed as I appear in the picture. The image is low resolution as I used the front camera on my phone.

I never saw this opportunity coming at all. Only last night I was posting here on Flickr about my frustrations. Right now I am quite simply in heaven!

Helene x

Tags:   transvestite crossdress t-girl transgender transsexual transexual t-gurl gurl drag transvestism transsexualism female impersonator female illusion male to female female impersonation tranny trannie trans queen drag queen ladyboy third sex glbt m2f m to f crossdressing crossdresser gender homosexual gay lesbian effeminate boy to girl acting performance wig makeup dressing up as a woman men who dress as women dressing up men dressed up

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I'm not expecting this picture to generate much interest at all here on Flickr. The reason I'm posting it is I am at heart a man who who wanted to be an actress. I wanted to play female roles. What this means is I enjoy experimenting with make-up, wigs and female outfits.

The reality is I am rubbish at acting but as I get older I fear missing out on my dream of taking on female roles. Some may cringe and squirm at my admission of wanting this and though I think I may well invite ridicule I simply had to try it out, albeit in private.

I have always liked the look of the business woman and female lawyers. Their outfits are stylish and admittedly prim and somewhat severe. I think the mix of primness with make-up, bright red lipstick and smooth shaved legs and high heel court shoes is a mix of femininity and confidence and I do find it rather sexy.

On Sunday, having had my first cross-dressing opportunity in ten months I had a desire to try out the severe lawyer appearance I enjoyed putting on the make-up, finding a suitable wig and skirt suit and felt the final touch to get the look was to adopt a less than impressed aloof haughty expression on my face and fasten up the top button on my shirt.

It is not a pretty feminine look but I felt quite the woman when I stood in front of the mirror and ruined the prim severity by smiling at my reflection. Having finally got into character and wiped the smile of my face, I took a photo. I'm going to admit I really enjoyed this look and felt quite a thrill to be portraying myself this way. If I am honest, I actually felt empowered to be this woman, the whole outfit was great to wear and I loved the shoes. I would love to go to a meeting dressed this way. I have always been attracted to the prim tailored appearance of female lawyers. I think the make-up and the skirt and heels gives their image real panache over their male counterparts.

I think it would be fun to create a theme on Flickr of prim but stylish tailored female looks. I am definitely going to explore this one further. Has anyone else ever faced exploring this type of female appearance?

Tags:   transvestite crossdress t-girl transgender transsexual transexual t-gurl gurl drag transvestism transsexualism female impersonator female illusion male to female female impersonation tranny trannie trans queen drag queen ladyboy third sex glbt m2f m to f crossdressing crossdresser gender homosexual gay lesbian effeminate boy to girl acting performance wig makeup dressing up as a woman men who dress as women dressing up men dressed up

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A week ago I had my first (unforeseen) opportunity to cross-dress as my female alter-ego in 2013. It was a liberating and emotionally rewarding experience. I have a deep need to express my feminine self on occasion and I was euphoric to be able to fulfil my desire once more.

Late on Friday evening I finished work very late and was about to climb into bed for some much needed sleep. It was close to midnight but realising this would likely be my last opportunity to cross-dress for many months I fought off my tiredness and attempted to motivate myself to cross-dress and become Helene one last time. I will admit I was shattered and extremely tired but I ended up putting on my make-up and dressing in women's clothing.

I did once more experience real joy but by 3 o'clock in the morning I simply had to stop. I took a few pictures and recorded some musings on video. I knew these memories would sustain me through the coming months when cross-dressing would not be possible.

This picture (a still frame from the video recording) is one of the nice memories from that sudden decision to spend a few more hours as Helene. I do love to become her.

Tags:   transvestite crossdress t-girl transgender transsexual transexual t-gurl gurl drag transvestism transsexualism female impersonator female illusion male to female female impersonation tranny trannie trans queen drag queen ladyboy third sex glbt m2f m to f crossdressing crossdresser gender homosexual gay lesbian effeminate boy to girl acting performance wig makeup dressing up as a woman men who dress as women dressing up men dressed up

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Real life has continued to be busy since my brief and very late at night impromptu cross-dressing session of a week ago. I will admit I am still on a high and thrilled that I did get dress as a woman. It always feels incredible to wear a wig, dress, heels and make-up. It liberates an aspect of my persona I can rarely set free. The bottom line is I love becoming a woman and dream of what could have been. The time to act on this was as a young single man. If I had been brave enough back then I would now be living as a woman.

I am now compressing the missed years of being female into short bouts of cross-dressing. This is why I still have a tendency to dress in shorter dresses and skirts and wear high heels to match those outfits. I am now fifty four years of age and should be approaching my cross-dressing with a more mature outlook. This does not mean I have to be dull and dowdy, I think I can enjoy elegant stylish female clothing that suits a woman of my age. I cannot quite escape my 'mutton dressed as lamb' period as I do get a thrill from appearing in an outfit such as I chose in this picture.

Before any advice is offered that I should transition and be true to myself let me clearly state this is no longer something I wish to do. I have a life now that I enjoy. Sharing my life with my wife means far more to me than my inner desire to be a woman. Throughout life one is faced with choices that involve compromise. For me the compromise was good decision. Becoming an occasional transvestite provides an outlet for me to express my female self. I feel fortunate I can do this.

I had a lot of fun being my female alter-ego despite the lateness of the hour last Saturday. I felt euphoric and genuinely excited to pose for the camera as Helene. This is actually a still frame lifted from a video I was recording. I hope to post the video in the near future.

Tags:   transvestite crossdress t-girl transgender transsexual transexual t-gurl gurl drag transvestism transsexualism female impersonator female illusion male to female female impersonation tranny trannie trans queen drag queen ladyboy third sex glbt m2f m to f crossdressing crossdresser gender homosexual gay lesbian effeminate boy to girl acting performance wig makeup dressing up as a woman men who dress as women dressing up men dressed up

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Just over a week ago I made use of a sudden opportunity late at night to set free my female alter-ego Helene. I had a rather fabulous time as I enjoy being her. I could not resist recording my delight at indulging in some male to female cross-dressing so I set up a backdrop and my video camera, attached a radio microphone under my dress and proceeded to enthuse.

It is completely self indulgent but I will confess I was thrilled to be Helene once more. we can become hung up and experience highs followed by crashes when it comes to cross-dressing. I think we need to accept to how wonderful an activity it truly is and not let it be ruined by the negative crashes that can follow these experiences. Extreme cases lead to purging.

The bottom line is if we desire to dress and look like women then that desire is never going to go away. It is with is for life. Embrace it when an opportunity arises as it is a rather euphoric and joyous experience. If one is a transvestite then it is for life, there is no escaping it. Many have tried, I suppressed it for over twenty years but I know now I was deluding myself. I like, indeed I must fulfil the desire to engage in this activity. It is something I have a need to express as it frees the trapped woman within me. Without any cross-dressing, and it is rare for me to do so, I would not be a complete person. It is a fundamental part of me I must free on occasion.

Helene x

Tags:   transvestite crossdress t-girl transgender transsexual transexual t-gurl gurl drag transvestism transsexualism female impersonator female illusion male to female female impersonation tranny trannie trans queen drag queen ladyboy third sex glbt m2f m to f crossdressing crossdresser gender homosexual gay lesbian effeminate boy to girl acting performance wig makeup dressing up as a woman men who dress as women dressing up men dressed up

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